1. We hope our favorite team signs Michael Vick for one reason, and one reason only: PETA protests! Naked PETA babes in body paint in cages (we know of them pulling this one before when the circus comes to town) outside the stadium on game day. Might be enough to pull us away from the tailgate a few minutes early.
2. If some team brings Vick in as a backup, and wants to bring him in for a few plays a game to run the Wildcat formation, we humbly submit that they rename it the Pitbull formation. Please?
3. If we don't get either one of those, Vick in Cleveland playing in front of the Dawg Pound will suffice. That is all.
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