Lone stars

The flap about a London Super Bowl recently was a waste of time, since we're one crazy legislature away from already having an international Super Bowl on the schedule: the 2011 edition in post-secession Independent Texas.

Texas secession would also give the NFL its first international teams and give Toronto some company in MLB and the NBA. And don't even start thinking about the U.S. medal count in London -- if all those gymnasts and swimmers that train in Texas can get "citizenship," they could put a serious dent in our total. That's not even counting that tae kwon do family in the commercials.

This is if we don't immediately attack freshly seceded Texas, or just bomb it back to the Stone Age, or at least the Alamo. They lay on their doctrine of Texas exceptionalism pretty heavy, and I think the enlistment rates in Oklahoma and some of the other border territories would be impressively high.